What Nobody Tells You

Dear Teagan:
There are so many things about being a parent that I didn't expect. So many things no one told your father and I! Yeah, we knew we'd be responsible for your life and that we'd forever be broke. But then there are things I wish someone would have told me. This entry is basically all me to go back and read before your brother or sister comes along. I'll need the reminder.
Labor & Delivery: I always heard about how it would hurt, but no one tells you about how you get checked all the time and how incredibily uncomfortable it feels. Not to mention right before it's time to push they give you a perinium massage which feels like someones giving you the fish hook on your mouth, only it's your hooha. Also you hear about womens water breaking, well my dr broke mine. I expected he'd break it and that was that, but no, fluid keeps coming out, and it's gross. Then at times I honestly wondered why people have more than one kid. Now pushing, the part you think would hurt, it doesn't. You're too focused on good pushes and hurrying up and getting it put you don't hardly feel the contractions while you push.
Recovery: No one told me that after I had you that I would need like 4 boxes of maxipads because you bleed so incredibly much. Also, I didn't know it was good to have dermaplast and tucks pads to help alleviate the burning "down there." Also, it hurts to walk kind of for a few days because your bones hurt. Or to stand up after sitting, the pressure hurts the bones. It just sucked.
Breastfeeding: breastfeeding is a lot like being pregnant still. You still have to watch what you eat, can't have too much caffiene, and you can't get drunk. It's interesting finding what upsets your belly. So far beans, onions, eggs (or at least egg salad) grandma's homemade spaghetti sauce, and the most depressing, apple cider. I really love cider and found out that you didn't like it at about 5am three mornings in a row when you would barf, more like projectile vomit, down my nightgown!! Finally it clicked that it was my nightly glass of warm apple cider. :-/ Also, you need special bras that I like to call easy access bras. Finding nursing clothes is a pain. No one sells them around here!! Since I'm home for now, I wear tank tops everyday and usually freeze. Same thing to bed. Then there's pumping. I pump after each feeding in hopes to have enough stored to be able to hopefully stop pumping in may or June and still give you breastmilk until you turn one! And pumping makes me feel like a cow. It's exactly the same process! Daddy, Nana & papa all call me the milk machine. Oh joy.
Overall: hot flashes!! Holy cow, it's insane!! What else is insane is how fast you grow. So many people say to enjoy every minute and it's so hard when you are exhausted from getting up every 3-5 hours. But if you really do sleep when the baby sleeps the exhaustion isn't so bad...I assume, I haven't taken the advice. In the begining I thought i was fine with the lack of sleep and now it seems like I want to sleep longer.
No one told me how I would feel the first time I made you smile. Not just gas, but a real legit smile. It's been happening for a week now and they're more and more frequent. That's the best thing about getting up in the morning. You are soo smiley. And at night when I put you in your crib i listen to you on the monitor from our bedroom and you will sometimes giggle in your sleep or you will talk to the stars on your ceiling. It's an amazing feeling being a parent. And about your dad- no one told me how our relationship would change. We're so much closer. I love to watch him sit with you and I love hearing him tell you stories. I never imagined how great he'd be with you! I mean I knew of course he'd be a great dad, I just didn't think he'd want to change so many diapers and give you a bath! How could anyone not want to give you a bath?! You love it and are soo happy!! You're also very happy when you get changed. We put stuffed animals in between the wall and the changing table and you noticed them right away, but now you reach for them as well as talk to them. It's so cute!!!
No one tells you when it's appropriate to call the pediatrician. Like when you kept barfing, should I have called then?
Oh so much has happened with you already that I didn't expect and I'm sure ao much more will! I just love it!!
I love you tons and tons baby boy!
Love,
Mommy