Home & Settled!

Dear Teagan:
Finally home and starting to get our life normal. The first night home you only woke up to eat once! It was fantastic! Then it progressively got worst. Twice the next night, then 3 times the next. But now we're okay! You get up about every 3 hours which is fine with me! Daddy doesn't get up with you during the night because you were refusing a bottle up until yesterday! And also because he has to work so it makes more sense for me to get less sleep because I can sleep all day (yeah right)
Your first night home and your umbilical cord came off and you found your thumb! It still takes you a while to get it, but you love it when you do find it. Once we were home I stopped pumping and was only nursing you. I didn't care about supply I just wanted my breasts to feel normal again! But now we have them under control and I'm back to pumping after each feeding.
We've taken many trips out into the world already! Tuesday we went with aunt Lindsey tomypur doctors appointment and you weighed in at 7lbs 9oz. She did another bilirubin test and it was up 2 points since we left! She said not to worry that we'd test it again on Friday. Wednesday we stayed home all day and mommy caught up on housework. Thursday we went grocery shopping with nana. I was so worried I'd forget you that I started walking away without paying for my groceries!! I left
my debit card sitting right up there and just walked off. Oh silly mommy. Then Friday aunt Erin and I took you for your blood work and then went shopping!!! Your bilirubin stayed the same since Tuesday and they weren't too concerned about it. They said since you are breastfed that's probably why it isn't going down as quickly. But they told me to just continue on breastfeeding and they'll just check it next week at your appt then. Aunt Erin and I got you the cutest clothes!! I'd never shopped for a boy, everyone I know has always had girls! I didn't know how much fun little boys clothes were! We got you tons of football outfits for this fall whenyou watch the games with daddy! I also bought you your very first Gap hoodie! It's so stinkin cute!!! Someone grandma works with (Shelby) got you your first pair of Gap jeans already! They're super cute. You're going to be such a stud!
Tomorrow we're going on our first outing with daddy and it's also the first outing where you'll be out of your carseat. We're going to our friends house! You'll get to meet all of your future classmates! There will be 6 babies there all under the age of 1! It'll be fun! I was having a bit of anxiety about it sixe you weren't taking a bottle and I am non good about being discrete while nursing and I had a dream you peed thru your clothes and I didn't pack extras. But now I'm feeling better about it and I'm excited to go!
Now off to fold and put away all your new clothes!
Love you baby boy!
Love,
Mommy

We're Still Here

Dear Teagan:
Day 4 and we're still here in this stupid hospital. Yesterday morning your bilirubin level was at a 10.92 so that was good. The pediatrician and I decided to leave you off the UV lights and test you again at 4pm to see where it was then. She said if it was 12 or under we could take you home. I had high hopes! But 4 rolled around and your level was back up to 12.11. .11 over the going home limit. The pediatrician contemplated letting us take you, but thought it was best to just put you back under the lights for the night and go from there. The nurses assured me that this was best and that had they let me take you home we'd be back here the following morning for a blood draw, and if it was any higher they'd admit you and we'd be up on the pediatrics floor. So I am glad that we don't have to go through that. So dad and I left when you got under the lights and we went to grandma and grandpas for dinner and also stopped at WalMart to get a few things I needed. We came back for your 9pm feeding and dad got to hold you for a little bit too. Then you went back and when I went to get you at midnight the nurse working happened to also be the lactation consultant. So I ended up feeding you while she watched so she could help me out. The next 2 feedings she chatted with me and helped me out. It was nice to have the company while feeding, and it was even better having the feedback. Now I'm really feeling confident about taking you home and breastfeeding going really well. She also had me fill out a paper for the lactation consultant up our way to come visit us at home if we need her to! And it's free! And we love free!! Hopefully we don't have any problems where we'd need her to come to our house, but its good to know she'll be calling and checking on us and if we did need her she would come. If not, I can just ask her questions over the phone!
Alright, I'm off to go get you for a feeding and hopefully good news!!
I love you tons munchkin!
Love,
Mommy

Stupid Jaundice!

Dear Teagan:
Well we thought we would have you at home to ourselves by now but no. You are down in the nursery under the UV lights catching a tan while I sit here in this hospital bed. You're doing great though! Waking up every 3 hours exactly for your feedings and filling diapers left and right. On day 1 your bilirubin level was an 8.4, not too bad so they didn't do anything they just were going to check it again on day 2. That was yesterday. They said the lab would come get your blood at 6am, but no, she didn't show up until almost 8am. But my Dr. came in at 6am and said I could be discharged because I was good to go. We were just waiting on you! So we didn't get your results back until around 10:30. Then they said your level was at 11.3 so they wanted to take more blood at 2pm and we were hoping by then there would be no change and we'd be on our way. So 2pm rolled around and a lab tech actually was on time and so we knew we had about 2-3 hours to wait so daddy and I decided to go to the mall really super fast to get me some nursing bras and a nursing cover since we'd be having lots of visitors once we got home. So i stopped at the nurses station and told them I would be right back and the lady said that was fine. Next think I know we're walking through the mall and I get a call from the maternity ward saying I needed to come back asap. I thought something was seriously wrong with you. But luckily, that was not the case. I had apparently NOT been officially discharged on paper and I wasn't supposed to leave! Ahhh! Whoops! So we got back here as quickly as possible. The nurses thought it was kind of funny. So around 4pm they came in with the bad news. Your bilirubin levels were up to 14. So with that they took you away to the nursery for your tanning session. They said you needed to be under the lights at all times except to eat, and even then you were only allowed to be out for a 1/2 hour. I cried. I just wanted to take you home. I told dad he could go home and he was about to but then I started crying again. I was a mess. Between the hormones and the lack of sleep I just couldn't deal well. The nurse came in and brought me an electric hospital grade pump because I was so engorged and the manual one they brought earlier wasn't doing much for me. She said I had enough pumped to go home as long as I was back by 7am this morning. I thought about it, but I really did not like the idea of leaving you here and you feeding from a bottle and not coming out of the isolette. So I decided to leave around 6:30 and let the nurse feed you with a bottle of expressed milk and then I'd be back by 10 for a feeding. It made me cry seeing you from the window under the lights in the isolette. I knew it didn't hurt you or anything, but it was just hard to see. Daddy took me to grandma and grandpa's and he went home to the dogs and cat. If it wasn't for the animals I wouldn't have felt so bad about staying longer I don't think. I just felt like we haven't been home in like 4 days and then we'd come home with a baby and they'd be so mad at us. So anyway, dad dropped me off and I went in to grandmas and had another nervous breakdown. I didn't want dad to have to stay at home without us, but he was tired and cranky and needed to get some good sleep. Apparently when he got home he had a little bit of a breakdown too. He hated the fact that he had left us here. This was not the plan. The plan was for you to be born and then we all come home together as one happy family. I never thought I'd be at the hospital with you while dad was at home.
So I hung out with grandma for a little bit until my breasts hurt and I needed to get back here to pump. I got back around 8:30 and pumped then took a shower. At 10 I went down to get you and we came back and ate. 1am rolled around and a nurse brought you to me to eat. You had a hard time latching on at that feeding so I had to pump to get you to latch on. So after taking you back I set my alarm for 10 minutes before I had to go get you so I could pump before you came to me. That worked well. You were right on schedule every time. I'd get to the nursery and you'd be all changed and waiting at the door in your little crib. Then after eating I'd take you back and you'd fall right asleep until next time. The nurses said you must be eating good to keep you asleep for that long and that every diaper change was poop and pee. Which is exactly what we need to get that bilirubin out of your system!
They said the lab was right on time this morning at 6 and they took your blood. I'm waiting to hear back on those results and to talk to a pediatrician that will be seeing you today.
Well little man, you need to eat again in about 45 minutes so I'm going to get something to eat and go get you and see what the good word is this morning!
I love you tons and tons and I hope today is our day to bring you home!
Love,
Mommy

One Day Old!!

Dear Teagan:
Today was supposed to be your due date but you did end up making your debut a day early!!! I'm so happy that you are here. You are the most beautiful baby in the whole wide world. Absolutely perfect!! I can't even begin to describe the feelings I have for you. Now, so we never forget, here is your birth story.
All day Tuesday at work I was having a lot of cramping and contractions and they wouldn't go away with water or anything. I didn't think too much of it though. I went home, ate dinner with Daddy and then all of a sudden I was exhausted. I went to bed at 9. I remember looking at the clock at 9:15 because I was having a contraction and I was going to see when the next one came. Instead, I fell asleep. I was awoken around 11 with another contraction. It hurt, but not too bad so I fell back asleep. About 1ish I was awoken to another. I got up and used the bathroom and let the dogs out and had another. I decided to stay on the couch for a while and try timing them. It was wishful thinking that they meant anything but I liked timing them anyway. After having them for about an hour I was starting to fall asleep so I went back to bed. The contractions continued throughout the night and were getting more and more painful. I would just breathe (apparently heavily) through them. Daddy got up and went to work but questioned whether or not he should stay home with me. I told him go ahead, it was no big deal because the contractions were coming so irregularly. I tried to go back to sleep but I couldn't. I had already known that I would be calling into work as I had a job interview at Gouverneur School. I was really hoping the contractions would slow down or go away so I could go to my interview. That didn't happen. I took two hot showers to try and ease the pain in my back that was coming with contractions. It worked a little. I also tried rocking back and forth and bouncing a little on my yoga ball. Finally it was time to go to the interview. I got there and the principal was the main interviewer. When he called me the week before I told him I was pregnant and due on Friday and he said that was okay and that he used to be an EMT and had delivered a baby before. He jokingly said that he could interview me in between contractions to distract me. Well, little did he know that that really would be the case. I got to the interview, still having contractions and I had noticed they were getting more and more frequent. I went in gave it my best. I was interviewed by Mr. Dickson along with 5 other teachers who were females. In the middle of the interview one of the teachers asked when I was due and I told her Friday, which then lead the principal to ask "Are you having Braxton Hicks or contractions?" So I said "I'm not really sure." So he goes "Well I've been watching you and timing them and they're about 7 minutes apart, I think you're in labor." So I tried to brush it off and continue with the interview, but when he noticed them coming about 6 minutes apart he wrapped things up. They were all so worried about me driving home and this and that. They told me I had won the competition for the day. Early before it was my turn apparently a man had come in with a broken foot shoved into a shoe for the interview and he was in a lot of pain and they though that he was the winner, until I came in.
So after I was escorted to my car, I was instructed to call my Dr. So I did and they told me to come right in to get checked out. I called Daddy to come home from work and he did. He was nervous I could tell. Like instead of being in a super hurry he took a shower and then proceeded to shave his face. Oh well I was in no hurry. I thought that this was just false labor and they'd send me home. We got to the Drs office about 2:15 and I was seen by Dr. Eugene since Dr. Dodard was on vacation. He checked me and I was 2-3 cm dilated. He tried stretching me to a 3 and stripped my membranes. He told us that he would probably see us in the next few hours and that we should go home and eat, walk and relax. So thats what we did. I couldn't sleep, I was too anxious and contractions were down to 5 minutes apart. At around 8:30 Daddy starting getting nervous since my contractions were about 4 minutes apart. We were supposed to call when they were anywhere from 3-5 mins apart. I was just in denial I think about it being real so I was procrastinating calling. Finally about 9 I called and they told me to go in. We got to the hospital about 10pm on Wednesday night. I was hooked up to monitors to monitor my contractions and your heartrate. She checked my cervix and I was still only at a 3, but she said I was contacting a lot. (I could have told her that!) The nurse had me drink some juice and lay on my side to get your heart rate to accelerate to make sure you didn't lose oxygen during contractions. It worked. At 10:50 she told us to go walk the halls for an hour and come back and she'd recheck me. We walked for about 40 minutes and then I needed to lay down. I was starting to get dizzy and feeling like I was going to pass out when I had contractions. We laid down and the nurse didn't come back in until about 12:30am. She checked me and I was about a 3-4. That's it?! By then the contractions were really hurting. I was falling asleep in between them and waking up in excruciating pain. Grandma and Grandpa decided to come in around 1am I think it was. Then a nurse came in and asked me if I wanted anything for pain. I told her yes although my plan was to go all natural. I couldn't do it anymore and I needed some sleep. They offered me an epidural or some IV drugs that would take the edge off. I went with the IV drugs. As soon as they injected them man did I feel them. I started feeling really fuzzy and was in and out of it. Dr Eugene came in and broke my water and some lab guy came in and took blood work in case I wanted the epidural at some point. This is where everything gets really blurry. I know I was talking in my sleep and not making any sense at all. I'm pretty sure I did sleep for at least an hour without too much pain. At some point the nurse asked me if I wanted pitocin to speed up the contractions....Uhhh no thanks. I was in enough pain and I've heard how the pitocin will stack contractions and I didn't want that. I'm not sure if she checked me then or not. But when she did some back in a check me I was at 8 cm. She said I would dilate more if I just breathed through contractions and tried to relax. (Yeah, okay) I wanted the epidural now, but she said it was too late. She also made me get up out of bed and told me to walk around the room and when I had a contraction to squat down as far as possible to get your head in the perfect position since they knew delivery would be soon. After doing that a couple of times I started feeling like I was going to throw up from the pain and being out of bed. I tried sitting in a chair but I can't remember why I got up and into the bed. She checked me again and by now it was about 6:30 I think and she apparently told Grandma that your head was right there and I was just about all the way dilated. They said to give the nurse a call when I felt like I needed to poop. Well by then the contractions hardly hurt anymore, it was more the pressure of you being so low. I wanted to you out. At about 7:30 the nurse checked me again because I told her I felt like I needed to poop. I wasn't sure if that was what I really was feeling but I knew that when you get that feeling that its time to push. So she checked me and said I was just about at 10cm but there was a little bit of cervix still there that needed to dilate. She told me if I pushed it would cause it to swell and then it would be harder to get him out. After a little while Dr. Eugene came in and stretched me to a 10. We were ready to get you out. Daddy had every intention of staying up by my head while you were being delivered, but that didn't happen. The Dr had him get right down and hold one of my legs while grandma held the other. Aunt Erin stayed up by my head and was texting Grandpa who was out in the waiting room. The Dr said to me "You need to show some energy if you want this baby out." Once he said that, it was on. I went from being this crazy groggy drugged zombie to all of a sudden fully alive and functionable. I started pushing at about 8:10am. I was told to give 3 pushes for every contraction, but all of a sudden my contractions slowed down. They gave me some pitocin to get them going again. I started pushing. Sometimes even giving 4 pushes for each contraction. Dad was counting to 10 and cheering me on. The Dr said he could see your head and grandma started crying and her and daddy both were rooting for me to push you out. Finally, our came your head and the rest of you slid right out. You were born at 8:40am after only about a 1/2 hour of pushing. Aunt Erin said you were a boy. The Dr flopped you up on my chest and we were all checking you out. You were purple and a little slimy, but you were ours and just absolutely perfect. Daddy cut your cord and Grandma started taking lots of pictures. We tried to get you to nurse but you were too busy starting life. They weighed you and you tipped the scales at a whopping 7 pounds and 13 ounces. They wrapped you all up and put a hat on you and you got passed around the room to everyone. Great Gma even came to see you first thing! Grandpa was so excited to see you and hold you. Finally a boy for him. He's such a proud grandpa. He took all sorts of pictures on his phone so he could show you off.

After everyone left the room and they took you to the nursery it was time for me to get up. And it hurt. And I felt really dizzy. I rode in a wheelchair down to the postpartum room. They said you would be in the nursery for about 2 hours. As much as I wanted to see you again, I needed to sleep. I hadn't slept in 2 nights. Daddy and I both got an hour nap in before they brought you back. We each held you and then daddy went to get us some lunch. After lunch I tried to nurse you again. No luck. You were too tired. So instead we all took a 2 hour nap. Afterwards we were all feeling pretty good. You of course, stayed sleepy. Daddy and I both took showers and then it was time for visitors! Aunt Erin came and brought me some very pretty flowers and you some boy clothes! We tried to nurse again with the help of a nurse, but again, you were sleepy. She told me to just keep you there so you became familiar with my scent and that you would eventually get the hang of it. Then came nana and papa. They passed you around for a little bit and then Grandma, Grandpa and Aunt Lindsey came to visit. You got passed around so much and your picture was being taken left and right. Poor thing, you got blinded by all the flashes probably. Finally, everyone left and daddy went and got us some dinner. You all of a sudden became wide awake. So we tried nursing again and tada! You latched right now. And ever since, you've been nursing like a champ. You were quite fussy last night when it came time for daddy and I to go to sleep. But a nurse came and took you to the nursery for your hearing screening. When you got back we nursed again and we both fell asleep until about 2:15. We were up from then until 3 nursing and I changed you. That meconium poop of yours is quite icky and definately tarry like it was described to be! Then we went to sleep again and woke up at about 5:45 to nurse again. And I've been up ever since. You fell back asleep around 7:40, right before Grandma came to visit before work! While she was here visiting, the peditrician came to visit and check you out. You finally got measured. You are 21" long and perfect in everyway. He did mention that you looked to be a little bit jaundiced. They took you off to the nursery to get circumcised and to test you for jaundice. While you were gone I got myself showered and even put on a real nightgown. I was over the hospital gown! They brought you back just in time. They said you didn't even cry during the circumcision!! Your biliruben levels were high so a lab tech came in to draw blood to be sent out for a more accurate reading. You slept while she took you blood. You're such a strong lil fella! You've been sleeping ever since.
So far Grandma came to visit before work. Great Gma came and visited for a little while. Then Jenn came and brought you some outfits. And then Aunt Sheila & Uncle Todd came to meet you! And it's not just me, we all think you are perfect.
Daddy left this morning to go home to the dogs and do some stuff there. He also had to go to town and do some banking. He's on his way back now. He's just at Wal*Mart buying you some pants since we have lots of onesies and no pants!
Well my little man, you are ready to eat, so we will give it a try!
I love you tons!
Love,
Mommy

"Any day now"

Dear Bean:
Whenever anyone asks me when I'm due I tell them next Friday. But daddy and nana tell everyone any day now. Well yes, it could be any day now, but it bothers me because any day now could be like tomorrow whereas it probably won't be for another week or more.
We made it through Paul and Dee's wedding. I was sweating and having a ton of contractions. The bridal party was supposed to do the cupid shuffle, but, problem was, no one knew how to really do it. So of course, I got roped into being up there leading. 9 month pregnant chick in heals out on the dance floor shakin it- yeah, I was hott. Then once the dancing was really going, no one would let me sit. I was so hot and my feet were so achy and swollen. I did get some relief by goin into the walkin freezer!!! It was like heaven in there. All in all I had a good time. When we got home I took a nice shower and downed a bunch of water. Contractions still didn't stop and 2 of them were hard to walk through. But of course, I laid in bed, well fell asleep as soon as I hit the sheets and the contractions went away. Well if they didn't go away they weren't anything I couldn't sleep through.
So today I was feeling optimistic that today could possibley be your birthday, now that the wedding is over, but that optimism has gone away. I haven't had any good contractions today, just annoying ones. Although, I think you may have dropped more into my pelvis. My pubic bone is really hurting, I have a ton of pressure and I can feel you close to my butt when you move, and you hve been moving quite a bit today!! Well I guess no more today than any other day. Which is another reason why I think it'll be a while before you arrive, I hear babies movements slow down before they decide to come out. Yours haven't slow down in the least bit. And it makes me very uncomfortable whe you move in there, you don't have all that much room anymore, so you either hit my ribs or hips or just give me pains like you're twising my insides.
My massage the other night was great. I could use one like every other day. It made me a bit nauseous right after though. Kristy and I didnt end up getting pedicures because the wait was too long, so instead we opted for taco bell!
I was able to get my pedicure before the wedding though. Aunt Kim and I went together. My toes are sooo super cute!
Once again, the house is spotless. Grandma is letting me borrow her floor steamer tomorrow and I'll get that done tomorrow night and then I shall wait. Probably end up cleaning again next weekend to take my mind off waiting around for you. I still want to shampoo the living room. I thought about it today but it looked like it would rain so I didn't want to takethe chance of the dogs muddying it up so soon. Maybe next weekend or some morning this week on a day I leave the dogs out.
Alright I think I'll pop in a moving and take a lil nap. Daddy has been napping for 2 hours. I always find it super annoying when he naps because Im usually doing housework. Not that I even want him to be doing it, it's just the fact that I'm being productive and he's not that makes me mad. Oh well.
I love you tons Bean.
Love,
Mommy

Feeling Discouraged

Dear Bean:
It seems as though you will not be making your debut this weekend. Or probably within the next week. I'm feeling like I want to punch everyone that ever told me I wouldn't make it until my due date because I'm pretty sure I'll go over. I woke up in a fantastic mood today and was feeling extremely optimistic about my appointment. I even packed my bag in the car along with my Boppy and a bag for daddy just in case he had to leave from work. Well lo and behold you are not making an appearance any time soon. Only dilated to 1 cm. So basically I went from "starting to dilate" to dilated to 1 cm. I thought for sure with all the contractions I've been having that they would have dilated me more than that! I knew I should have just declined being checked today. I left the OB office wanting to cry. I feel like I will be eternally pregnant. I know I shouldn't feel like this with a week left until my due date, but I do. I just want you out. I want to meet you and hold you and kiss you and cuddle you and everything else.
But on the bright side, I won't be stressing anyone out this weekend by going into labor tomorrow. Daddy can be in the wedding and have a good time, Aunt Erin won't get interrupted on her camping trip and Gramma & Grampa won't have to worry about rushing home from Cortland. So I guess that's the good news.
I'm thinking if I just keep telling myself that I will be eternally pregnant then it will come as a complete surprise whenever you do decide you're good and ready to vacate the womb.
I'm so glad I'm getting my massage tonight. I really need it. And afterwards, pedicure with Kristy! If only I could have some wine while getting my toes done. But now I'm wondering if I'm using my pedicure gift card too soon. By the time you decide to come out I'm sure my toes won't be pretty still! :-( Oh well I'll have to just convince daddy that I need to get another one!
I love you Bean- but I would love you 110 times more if you would just come out.
Love,
Mommy

Into the Single Digit Countdown

Dear Bean:
8 days left until your estimated arrival date! I've been feeling more and more contractions and lots of cramping along with back pain. Hopefully it's working and getting you out of there! I hope you're ready! I really do not want to be overdue!
This Saturday Daddy is in Paul & Dee's wedding as the best man. I was totally dreading going as I didn't have a clue what to wear! Luckily, I found the perfect dress and it's so comfortable. So now I'm excited to wear it! Dad's super nervous about his best man speech, and he has nothing prepared for it. I feel bad because usually it's easiest for people to give speeches after a couple drinks, but he won't drink just incase you decide that its "time."
I have a feeling if you don't come before Saturday you probably will pick that day as a good day to come. Daddy will be in the wedding, Grandma & Grandpa will be down in Cortland for a family reunion, Aunt Erin will be camping without cell phone service, Nana & Papa will be with us at the wedding but will probably be drinking. It shall be interesting that's for sure!
Well it's time to go home to take the dogs for a walk and to hopefully make you "fall out."
Drs. appointment tomorrow! Maybe he'll send me straight to the hospital because you're ready! Oh wishful thinking.
I love you tons Bean! I can't wait to meet you within the next week or so!
Love,
Mommy

Happy birthday to me!

Dear Bean:
Today is my birthday! You would make the best birthday present! Just a hint of course! Today daddy and I are going to Black Lake
to go out on the boat and relax. It is most likely our last Saturday to just relax before you come! That is if you
come on time. Next weekend we have Uncle Paul & Aunt Dee's wedding so of
course we'll be busy!
Yesterday the doctor told me my cervix is starting to soften and I'm starting to dilate. He won't give exact answers because he wouldn't want me to get all crazy excited or be disappointed at next weeks appointment if the status hasn't changed any. But it made me happy. My body seems to be doing something to prepare for delivery.
Nana seems to think I'll go into labor after a family dinner. Well tomorrow we're havin family dinner at grandma and grandpa's to celebrate mine and grandma's birthdays. So maybe I'll go into labor after that and then you'll be born on 8-9-10 just like I want! We'll see!! We all know what my wishes on my birthday cake will be! ;-)
Well, better get ready to go!! I love you Bean!!
Make all my birthday wishes come true please!!
Love,
Mommy

Dear Bean:
So the changing of the sheets didn't work. Our walking isn't going so well. It's back to being super humid this week, so therefore I'm back to being full of complaints. I don't let myself get all worked up, I just have a positive attitude and hope like hell I go into labor. I'm pretty sick of people asking things like "You're still pregnant?" or "You haven't had that baby yet?" Does it look like I've had the baby yet?!?!
I'm still contracting...and they still aren't progressing into anything. Just when I start to think they're getting regular they fizzle out.
I went to the chiropractor the other day to get one last adjustment before your arrival and she adjusted my hips since they were out of line and also adjusted my pubic bone. When she went to do that though she said "No that baby hasn't dropped yet, its still up here." Ughhh. I sure as heck she's wrong! I mean my heartburn has subsided, well it's gotten alot less frequent, and I feel more pressure lower and I have to pee more. So I thought those were all signs that you've "dropped." We'll see tomorrow I suppose.
Yesterday I had someone at work paint my toes for me so I could have pretty toes in case I went into labor before I go get a pedicure (which I asked for a gift certificate to do so for my birthday) But anywho, my toes turned out really good and I love them!

If you're a girl, I will paint your toes for you!! Of course I'll have to do it while you sleep so you're not moving around all over getting polish everywhere it shouldn't be.
My energy to do as much is slowly decreasing, but I'm still keeping up very good on all the housework. I even gave the dogs a bath!! But I think the decline in energy/ambition is due to the fact that I have decided to give up on expecting you to come today, or whatever day it is, so I figured why use up all my energy on trying to be super prepared for you NOT to come yet?
Well we'll see what the Dr has to say tomorrow!! Hopefully something good!
I love you tons and tons Bean.
Love,
Mommy

Life is great

Dear Bean:
I had a really great weekend! Saturday daddy went to a bachelor party (and was super responsible and didn't get drunk so he could take me to the hossy if you decided to come...which obviously you didn't) But while he was gone I went out shopping with a friend and picked up the last of the things I needed for you. More crib sheets and the breast pump. I also picked up myself a pair of super comfy capris. I can wear them now and after you arrive. Then we went out for a late lunch/early dinner. Then I went and bought a yoga ball and a nice lamp and shade for your dresser. I bounced on that ball for about an hour Saturday night. It got me contracting throughout the night and I could hardly sleep. But nothing painful or anything. Then yesterday my nesting kicked into full gear! I got right up and went to the grocery store to get some stuff. Then once I got home I made monkey bread, did more laundry (at this point I'm just doing super small loads which annoys me, but I have the need to feel productive so if there's dirty laundry I wash it!), I had daddy take apart your bassinet and washed that, got on a chair and cleaned the ceiling fan, dusted the end tables and TV stand, washed the walls by the dog bowls (they're very messy when they eat and drink), swept and vacuumed all the floors, then I boiled some eggs for egg salad for me, daddy and for macaroni salad for tonights dinner, also marinated chicken for tonights dinner, made spaghetti for last night, cut up some cheese for daddy to have on his bagels for breakfast this week and I got my lunch bag mostly packed for today. Then after we had dinner, we went for a mile walk with the dogs and then came home and I watered all the plants and trees in the yard (let me tell you what, that 2 gallon watering can gets pretty heavy after walking all over the yard with it) Finally daddy told me I needed to shower since it was 9pm and I hadn't done that yet for the day. After my shower I still had energy so I bounced on my ball some more. I figured I'd sleep really well since I was so busy all day and didn't sleep well the night before, but no. I was up all the time. Had to pee, had contractions, was too hot, just couldn't sleep for no reason- it was annoying. So I was up bright and early when dad got up at 6. Stripped the bed down and got the sheets in the washer so we will have nice fresh sheets to sleep in tonight- I'm hoping that because I washed the sheets today my water will break all over them tonight. Again, doubt it, but I know you'll make an "inconvenient" debut!
Daddy and I are going to walk a mile every night after dinner from now on. If it doesn't help being on labor then at least it'll help me get into a little better shape before labor and get me back into the walking mood for after you come! I've always liked to walk, but then it was so super humid the past few months I was totally out of the notion to even move. And when it did cool down at night we were eating dinner! But now I'm more organized and on top of things and we'll be eating when I get home and then we can take our walk around 7:40ish.
So I'm looking forward to my drs appointment this Friday. I'm not sure why, I guess I always look forward to them. I even think this week will go by fast! I know today has seemed to already have flown by for me. And I haven't even been busy! Lets hope the rest of the week goes smoothly and I don't have any crazy meltdowns like I did last week. Ooooh and Saturday is my birthday!! Finally a birthday that falls on a Saturday when I'm legal to drink...and I can't. Oh well. I love you way more than any alcoholic beverage!
I love you Bean. I can't wait to meet you.
Love,
Mommy