Dear Bean:
I am 35 weeks pregnant today! You should be arriving within the next 5 weeks!!! Only 35 days- thinking about it that way is scary! If you are late, the very latest we should expect you would be 6 weeks, as my Dr will only let me go a week overdue before inducing.
So this jealousy thing, well it sucks. I just feel jealous of all sorts of people lately. Like Lori that I work with, her son & daughter inlaw- they had their baby on Tuesday and came home yesterday. Some of the women in my online birth groups are already dialting and are expecting their babies within the next week, if not days. I'm just jealous that I didn't get pregnant sooner and can't have you here sooner.
Next, I'm jealous of all the people being able to do all sorts of fun things this summer. For once in for forever there are actually fun things to do and I am unable to. The first one is the Alan Jackson concert- TONIGHT. It's going to be a big concert and TONS of people including most of our family and some friends will be attending. I even got 2 FREE tickets at work today. But am I going? No. I can't stand that long in this heat/humidity, or be so super close to a bunch of drunk people waving beers and cigarettes around me. I'd just end up super cranky and want to go home. So I'm being a nice sister and giving them to Aunt Erin & Todd. But I'm jealous I have to miss out. It sucks. Then the other concert is Gretchen Wilson with Chris Cagle, Eastin Corbin & Jamie Johnson. That one is only $40 for like 7 hours and I have to miss it because it is 2 days after you are due. I wasn't going to spend the money on it if I hadn't had you by then I wouldn't risk going and letting your daddy get drunk and again being around everyone so close to having you. And even if you are here by then you'll be way too new for me to voluntarily leave you for a whole day to go party. As much as I'd rather you be here than me to go to the concert, it's just the fact that I'm missing out. I hate missing out on stuff.
Next I'm just upset of what a beautiful summer this has been so far and I'm not enjoying it. I mean don't get me wrong I'm able to be outside and all, but I'm not really loving the heat. I am hating the humidity. It makes my feet and calves swell up and ache terribly. I'm jealous that daddy gets to come home every night and drink some beer to get refreshed and I come home and sweat my ass off and don't get to have a cold one. Ohhhh what a stupid summer for being pregnant. Last summer would have been way better. There was nothing going on and it rained all the time. I wouldn't have missed out on anything!
Okay Bean, my vent is over, along with my workday.
Love you and I will see you soon!!
Love,
Mommy
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